Managing In The Difficult Middle
VBJ:  BUSINESS WOMEN’S JOURNAL
July, 2000
JONNIE MARTIN


In their management styles, women have a wonderful bias toward the more humanistic “partnering” model described in Riane Eisler’s book, “The Chalice and the Blade.”  Men tend to lean toward the power-based “dominator” model.  Taken to their extremes, neither of these models work very well.

When I work with men, I often have to teach them the language and processes for participatory management.  When I work with women, we usually focus on control mechanisms.  While I may be approaching the issue from 180 degree opposites, the principle is the same:  it is desirable to aim toward managing in the difficult middle.

It is easy (and ineffective) to be aggressive, powerful, domineering, and inflexible.  It is easy (and equally ineffective) to be passive, docile and laissez-faire.  It is much more difficult to manage in the middle and to balance human needs against business realities, but that is the point of management effectiveness.  

Managers need to remember that they are not running a concentration camp nor a commune — they are managing human resources for the purpose of meeting business goals, which are set internally by the owners and externally by the customers.  By holding up these goals as clear expectations and standards, it is clearer for managers and subordinates to see the work that has to be done.

Sometimes this is a very emotional issue for women.  I once worked with a business owner who could not bring herself to criticize her staff.  She didn’t want to hurt their feelings, didn’t want to be seen as domineering.  Both of these reasons were very emotional and I could not offset them with discussions of the financial cost of avoidance management.  Instead, I was able to connect with her most clearly by pointing out that she was allowing her employees to fail.  That, by not offering criticism, she colluded in their poor performance that finally resulted in termination.  It is sometimes helpful for women managers to replace ineffective caretaking thoughts with effective ones.

In helping women business owners and managers learn to manage in that difficult middle, I have also found it helpful to outline some of the “control” mechanisms that support a viable business culture:

  1. Make certain that everyone in the organization knows the realities of the business, how it makes money, the expectations of the owners and customers, how companies get a competitive edge.
  2. Translate those business demands into standards of performance that meet the owner-customer expectations — and capture those standards in writing.  There should be manuals that capture every aspect of job performance and cultural expectations.
  3. Create training tracks for each position in the company that assures employees will be taught the business background, standards, culture and technical requirements of their particular job.
  4. Establish communication channels in the company that assures information will flow up, down, and on the diagonal.  Have retreats, monthly business meetings, brown bag lunches that allow for discussion of how to run the business better.
  5. Clearly identify various discussion groups or sessions as to their nature.  Whether they will be used to brainstorm ideas, to analyze options, or to make decisions.  Be sure everyone in the organization knows how and where decisions are to be made.
  6. “Frame” your communications with employees so that they clearly know your expectations.  “I want to take advantage of your great creativity on this project, so will you please bring back a proposal to me on May 5 so that we might discuss it.”
  7. Be clear in the amount of authority that you delegate.  In his book, “Management,” Ross Webber describes the various levels of authority, from “go get me this information, take no action” to “use your judgment and no reporting required.”
  8. Set deadlines, milestone measurements, report meetings, and put these onto a calendar or tickler system.  When a deadline is missed, directly deal with the issue.  Teach employees to meet deadlines — or to keep you updated if problems occur.
  9. Create internal audit systems, where you or someone on your behalf audits all the processes within the organization.  Through your office manuals you can identify what should be happening in the company — the audit determines whether it is.
  10. Stay centered, stable and strong so that you can weather the natural ups and downs of running a business.  Expect that there will be ups and downs.  Adopt the mental models that will serve you well during periods of volatility.
  11. Address problems head-on and quickly.  Do not allow them to fester or to grow like a cancer. Small problems can be nipped in the bud and cause very little human pain.  Large problems can erupt and spew noxious matter throughout the organization.
  12. Be decisive  Indecision is dangerous.  Just remember that you can’t avoid decisions.  There are the conscious decisions you purposely make — or the default decisions that occur from your inaction.